Tom Brady, a legendary quarterback, has declared his intention to leave the NFL so that he may devote more time to creating small wooden toys for his grandchildren. President Joe Biden has stated his intention to appoint a woman of color to replace the departing football star in response to the shocking revelation.
Biden told the media, “Listen, folks, it’s time. “There has never been a woman of color quarterback in the NFL’s century-long existence. Racist that is! We are all aware that black women are equally as intelligent and strong as white children.
In my capacity as president, I will propose a quarterback replacement for Tom Brady who represents the variety of America.”
When informed that he lacks the authority to recommend quarterbacks to the NFL, Vice President Biden assured his staff that he would simply sign the executive order and let the legal system handle the matter later.
There is no justification, Biden stated. We always invited the black women to join us when Jehoshaphat Jenkins and I played Nine Pins with the locals. Darn it, I was a civil rights hero! The rest of the world needs to catch up!
Up to this point, Colin Kaepernick in a woman’s wig, Tyler Perry, and Michelle Obama have all been mentioned as potential candidates for the open role.
